# NGU Caregiver: Notes for When You're the "Responsible Adult" (But Still Feel 15 Inside)

A collection of real strategies from the Never-Grew-Up community, adapted for caregiving.

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## 1. Your Scripts (Use These When Words Fail)

For the Doctor's Office:
"I'm calling on behalf of [name]. I have their insurance card and medication list in front of me. What information do you need?"

For a Family Member Who Judges You:
"I'm doing this the only way I know how. If you'd like to help, here's one specific thing you can take off my plate."

For Your Brain When It Says You Can't:
"I am allowed to feel like a kid and still be competent. These things are not opposites."

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## 2. The Sensory-Safe Caregiving Kit

- Noise-canceling earbuds (for waiting rooms)
- A small comfort object (keychain plush, fidget ring, smooth stone)
- Sunglasses (hospitals are bright)
- Pre-written scripts on your phone (see above)
- A 3-minute timer app (for when you need to pause)

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## 3. Permission Slips (Read These Out Loud)

"I give myself permission to feel like a child inside while caring for another human. This is my reality, not my failure."

"I give myself permission to use comfort objects, scripts, and sensory tools. These are accommodations, not regressions."

"I give myself permission to be exhausted, resentful, and loving all at once. Contradictions are allowed."

"I give myself permission to not have it together. Neither does anyone else — they're just better at pretending."

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## 4. Questions to Find Your One Person

- "Do you know anyone else who feels younger inside than they look on the outside?"
- "Do you ever feel like you're playing a role you didn't audition for?"
- "What's your favorite comfort show?"

Find someone who says yes, and keep them close.

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From The Unadulting Society | sfwagere.com
By Laynee Davis